Just heard on the news that its the coldest easter day since records began. All I know is I just had to turn the central heating up...and it tried to snow again yesterday. Our birds are being well fed with seed. They are busy visitors at the moment; the Robins are starting to nest build and fly in to grab pieces of moss and tiny twiglets.
It has been a weird week. I am still completely shattered and finding it hard to get out of bed. I have no energy at all and tend to do a lot of flopping about when I have managed to get up and dressed. I sleep a lot too. Its horrible. I hate being so lacking in umphh. Yet I feel happiest when I am under the duvet at whatever time of day. I guess part of this is what the nurses tell me is chronic fatigue syndrome and the other bit is some kind of depression which has settled around me. I am not, at least, feeling so out of sorts as I did when I last wrote. Slowly slowly starting to re-engage with the house and my old rhythm. But I am frustrated at the time everything is taking. Luigi is still having to help me climb up and down the stairs. My legs are so weak and stairs are a real challenge. Still struggling too with this bladder infection, which wakes me on the hour every hour during the night. Another good reason I guess for feeling so tired and wiped out. A decent nights sleep would do me the world of good.
Three out of five days last week I spent at the HOP clinic having blood tests and receiving various intravenous liquids. Doctors are pleased so far with how the transplant is going. I think my system now shows 100% donor blood cells - something known as chimerism. Anyway, its good. Visits to the clinic are always exhausting. Mainly a lot of just hanging around waiting, either for tests to be done or results to be had or doctors to see. Last thursday I got in at 9.30 and got home at 4.30... its almost like a full working day.
Hope everyone is well and having a good holiday weekend. Messages are still tumbling in which is so great. It is lovely to hear from so many people. I am amazed that you all still check in! Your support is much appreciated as I am sure you all know. Sorry for dull blog, but it has been hard work just writing this, both physically and mentally - my my, I gotta stop moaning. I am still OUT which is the best thing. I dread the thought of having to go back in. God forbid. Catch you all soon, big hug around the globe. tch xx
16 comments:
Hi Tessa, I'm so happy you're still at home, stop beating yourself up for moaning I'm sure everyone will agree you are entitled to!!! Just soak up the views of the sky, wildlife and garden and enjoy the feeling of freedom on your face:) Take care, love and hugs to you and Luigi as always Kate xxx
Your "Dull" blog is anything but, great to hear you're slowly re-engaging. Keep feeding the birds it's bloody cold out there! Damn the jet stream we need warmth. love Ianx
Give yourself time to recover. I can imagine that you are impatient to get back to normal and it's frustrating. Good news about the transplant progress. By the way; it's also bloody cold here in Switzerland. We woke up to snow again this morning. Keep warm and remember; baby steps. xx
Indeed the dull blog is anything but, and yes you can moan as much as you like at no extra cost !
So good to hear the positive bone marrow progress, you are so strong Tess I have no doubt the rest will follow in due course.
Sending loads of love and sunshine from the land down under xxx
So pleased to hear that you are home, I haven't checked in for a bit, you were not forgotten however. You are allowed to have a moan you know! Strikes me you have been unbelievable stoic during all the bad times. Enjoy the garden it is such a pretty space. I always think of the flowering potato plant! You have to pace yourself and if snuggled under the duvet is required then just do it! Lots of love P
So good to hear that you are home. We have followed your progress with concern, delight, amusement, but mostly with admiration. Rest up and take care.
Michael and Selina
Lovely Tessa, Go with the flow ! Take all the rest you can get because your body & soul are recharging. Its always so good to read your blog and moan as much as you bloody like.YOU ARE SPECIAL AND FABULOUS. love. Kxxx
White rabbits Tessa ! First day of the month luck and all that. I'd say you'd earnt carte blanch to do anything you bloomin well feel like. Happy Easter, lovin the yellow chick. Keep warm, love lynn x
Dearest Tess - it's an honour to have you spend your precious energy on us,ie on your blog which is not in the tiniest least dull! Thank you. I'm so sympathise with you're feeling so knackered but I'm absolutely sure this is a good sign - and this isn't a clumsy bit of CBT - that your body is doing its priority thing of getting better. More power to it! Wishing you rest and joy through these Duvet Days. Much love xxxT
Tessa, you can moan as much as you want to. It is quite courageous to inform us all how you are. Very much appreciated. Keep on running. Katrin and Matti
Just back from my daily walk to Whitstable harbour. It's actually very sunny with blue skies but still a cold wind. There's a lovely big solid bench with a high back and sides facing the sunset where you shelter from the wind and then the sun actually feels warm. I snuggle in their with my Kentish lager. This morning though I went to the forge (a shed) that sells fresh donuts and coffee – just the thing for a day like today. I'm a great believer in duvet power. I like to wrap a duvet around me and watch the food channel eating blocks of chocolate whilst drinking hot chocolate – the ultimate in luxury.
Hi Tessa
Can't believe its snowing again - just go into hibernation under your duvet build up your reserves and stay there till the blossom appears - and look forward greatly to that day xxxxxx
blog never dull - and easter card up to usual standard - of course you feel miserable. Mother Theresa would have moaned if she'd gone through what you are going through. Great news about the chimerism. Long may it chimer!Sunny in Norfolk but still bitter wind. No daffodils out yet! Snowdrops lasted about a month longer than usual though. Try to enjoy the duvet comfort - it sounds like the best place to be for a while longer. love Lisa xx
So glad you're still at home although trips to clinic sound like quite an ordeal. Easter fairly uneventful here with mixed weather. Still ploughing through boxes of stuff but the end is in sight.
Much love from Oz Kerry xx
Hi Tessa Gill here your childhood neighbour Just 'found'you after all these years.So sorry to hear that you have been so poorly Myself and all the family wish you all the very best much love xxxxx
Dear Tessa,
I hope you have been enjoying some sun - FINALLY - from your bed or sofa or even garden bench. Hope you are feeling but stronger and better. See you soon lots of love to you and Luigi from all of us.
Cathy
xx
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