...By my reckoning it’s been over four years since I last updated this blog. It seems that people still read it, unless of course it is plagued by robots (quite possible). So incase anyone is out there reading this, I am writing to say that I am still here. Very much alive and kicking! Since I last wrote my recovery from transplant has gone from strength to strength. There will always be blips and blood tests and things that make me stress and worry - but this is my new normal - so I deal with it. I still struggle with my EBV levels, which, on occasion have gone so high I have been set smartly off for a PET scan, but despite fears, everything seems to be ok. I have a theory that if I get ill or run down my new immune system is unable to 'multitask' and that when the EBV muscles in and makes its presence felt - not that I necessarily feel ill or have symptoms, but my levels shoot up - log copy 6:2 was the highest I think.... I get tired quickly - or at least don’t have much 'spare battery'. A very busy day (or long journey) can take 48 hours to recover from!
Not going to write much more - I just wanted to indicate that I am very much waving, not drowning. Life is good. I still have my caravan. Still working in my studio. And loving everyday. Thrilled to bits to still be kicking around on this planet.
I remember when I was first diagnosed I was desperately searching the internet for information (dangerous) and reading endless blogs (helpful). They gave me great strength and comfort....but then they would just stop. And I never knew why, which was always concerning and upsetting on many levels. I guess I did the same. And maybe that could be distressing for any reader of this blog. My apologies if so.
So far, I, like many others, am proof that leukaemia can be overcome. SCT's work. The NHS is a brilliant health system. I owe my life to it.
Good luck if you too are on this journey. It’s a roller coaster. Hold tight, roll with it. It can be done.
For more info please contact me at etch@tessaholmes.com
February 2019
Saturday 2 February 2019
Wednesday 24 December 2014
MERRY CHRISTMAS 2014
Ciao Tutti!
who knows who still reads this blog...but for anyone who is - Merry Christmas and Happy 2015...
Have meant to update for weeks - but in the end, time, as usual has run away with me and I am tripping behind it - so this will be just a brief xmas eve round up.
I hit my two year transplant birthday on 11th December - which was quietly celebrated by me (humming happy birthday) and a glass of prosecco! But what a birthday - and I am thrilled to bits to have reached this point relatively unscathed. Well, I was scathed - but time is a great healer and luckily I have forgotten most of the uglier moments of my recovery. I am still struggling with this EB virus though - the levels rock up and down at an alarming rate - so I am currently having weekly blood tests - hospital keeping a close check on me. However, I have no symptoms of anything - and am always surprised when I get a phone call to say "levels have gone up". It is a bit of a blot on what would otherwise be a clear landscape as we run up to the new year. However, nothing to be done except for my usual "keep on keeping on". Hopefully over the next few months my new (ish) immune system will sort it out.
Normal life meanwhile continues to take shape. I have finally moved into my new studio in Havelock Walk - so brilliant to be back on the street. Even better to have a working space of my own. There was a Christmas Open Studio event a couple of weeks ago - which went pretty well for me - so a good confidence booster. I am looking forward to producing some new work. My animation course is very enjoyable - hard work though - and I find it hard to retain all the information - especially the technical stuff... I will try and post something on here - though not sure if it will work... Amazingly I managed to get an upgrade on my caravan pitch - so now have a new van (central heating and double glazing!) situated on the very edge of the park - looking directly out onto the Rye Nature Reserve. I have a small square of decking - where I have plans to mount a telescope - the huge sweep of night sky is too inviting to be left alone - also a small private area of "garden" which I will enjoy. I must also get a good bird table. Some great birds out there on the reserve. So the caravan has already become a much more exciting project than I originally thought. As this year closes, I can definitely say, "every cloud has a silver lining"...
Thats it. Short and sweet. Got to iron a pink shirt, wrap last presents and head out for an Xmas Eve supper. Hope anyone who is reading this has a wonderful festive season. To dear friends and total strangers, my thanks for your support and interest and for those occasional messages that still come through! This is my (probably) penultimate blog - to be honest, I am rather loath to finish it while this virus is still circulating round my system - to sign off right now might just be tempting providence - and I don't want to do that! So, I will be back in 2015 - for a bit at least. Meantime all best wishes for a peaceful and happy Christmas around the globe. Love to north, south east and west. Keep warm and well. Back next year. tch x
who knows who still reads this blog...but for anyone who is - Merry Christmas and Happy 2015...
Have meant to update for weeks - but in the end, time, as usual has run away with me and I am tripping behind it - so this will be just a brief xmas eve round up.
I hit my two year transplant birthday on 11th December - which was quietly celebrated by me (humming happy birthday) and a glass of prosecco! But what a birthday - and I am thrilled to bits to have reached this point relatively unscathed. Well, I was scathed - but time is a great healer and luckily I have forgotten most of the uglier moments of my recovery. I am still struggling with this EB virus though - the levels rock up and down at an alarming rate - so I am currently having weekly blood tests - hospital keeping a close check on me. However, I have no symptoms of anything - and am always surprised when I get a phone call to say "levels have gone up". It is a bit of a blot on what would otherwise be a clear landscape as we run up to the new year. However, nothing to be done except for my usual "keep on keeping on". Hopefully over the next few months my new (ish) immune system will sort it out.
Normal life meanwhile continues to take shape. I have finally moved into my new studio in Havelock Walk - so brilliant to be back on the street. Even better to have a working space of my own. There was a Christmas Open Studio event a couple of weeks ago - which went pretty well for me - so a good confidence booster. I am looking forward to producing some new work. My animation course is very enjoyable - hard work though - and I find it hard to retain all the information - especially the technical stuff... I will try and post something on here - though not sure if it will work... Amazingly I managed to get an upgrade on my caravan pitch - so now have a new van (central heating and double glazing!) situated on the very edge of the park - looking directly out onto the Rye Nature Reserve. I have a small square of decking - where I have plans to mount a telescope - the huge sweep of night sky is too inviting to be left alone - also a small private area of "garden" which I will enjoy. I must also get a good bird table. Some great birds out there on the reserve. So the caravan has already become a much more exciting project than I originally thought. As this year closes, I can definitely say, "every cloud has a silver lining"...
Thats it. Short and sweet. Got to iron a pink shirt, wrap last presents and head out for an Xmas Eve supper. Hope anyone who is reading this has a wonderful festive season. To dear friends and total strangers, my thanks for your support and interest and for those occasional messages that still come through! This is my (probably) penultimate blog - to be honest, I am rather loath to finish it while this virus is still circulating round my system - to sign off right now might just be tempting providence - and I don't want to do that! So, I will be back in 2015 - for a bit at least. Meantime all best wishes for a peaceful and happy Christmas around the globe. Love to north, south east and west. Keep warm and well. Back next year. tch x
 |
| Cat and christmice |
Thursday 23 October 2014
CLOCKS GO BACK NEXT WEEK!
Ciao Tutti,
Oh my lord - its two months since I posted an update! I know there are still people out there who read this - so my usual apologies, once again, for the long silence. But pretty much, no news is good news. Bloods are all behaving themselves, and sitting happily bang-in-the-middle of normal. Except for my platelets which have been dropping over the last few months. No-one knows quite why. Unfortunately, I do have a virus shunting round my blood system at the moment. Its called Epstien Barr virus - linked to chicken pox and all related poxie-type things. Its not so hot for bone marrow transplant patients though, as it can kick off nasty stuff. However I have no symptoms of anything, which is a good sign. The hospital are doing are regular two weekly blood tests to monitor the virus levels. Hopefully my baby immune system (well, teenage I guess by now) will sort it out. But its taking its time! Maybe the drop in platelets is linked to the EB virus... I am also struggling with very painful bones. Me and early mornings aren't the best of friends! Have recently had tests and X-rays done for arthritis - so waiting to see if these produce any evidence. However, despite these hic-cups things are on the up. My immunisation programme has started. I even had a flu jab last week. Overall, I have much more energy, though probably will never recover to my pre-transplant level of zoomablity. Still easy-as-pie to get exhausted and then I have to shut down for a couple of days and recharge.
I have had a couple of late summer visits to the caravan. The brilliant and beautiful Indian summer has been a good excuse to get down there for some long weekends. Some great dusk walks along the shoreline. Watching the sky as it moves through the gears of sunset: to the west where it glows hot and loud, fire red and orange. To the east where it is brushed with hushed colours. Goose grey, pistachio green and pale blue. Out on the nature reserve there is a 360 degree view of this sunset. It is stunning. And the nights are deeply dark. The millions of stars which are so crisp and clear, really do shine like diamonds in the sky. My caravan was a good move!
Two really great pieces of news: One is I have started my animation course. This is very exciting. First exercise was to cut out and make an articulated puppet. This was then filmed. I had an aardvark (of sorts) doing somersaults! Its a 30 week course, designed to teach a selection of animation techniques. I hope at some point to combine this with my printmaking. Anyway, I am a student again, one day a week (and flop-out-flat when I get home after an intense 10 hour day) and really enjoying myself. The second even-better-news is that I have managed to secure a new studio back in Havelock Walk. For those of you who know me, you will know that this is a major step forward, on all sorts of levels. I am thrilled that I have another studio space back in the street. This means I can start work again. This means too that my life is starting to feel like mine again. I am functioning without the constant support of hospital. Though I will never completely rid the medical ties that bind me. But hey, small price to pay for my life back and pretty much in once piece. Thanks to the amazing advances in modern medicine, the dedicated work of the Antony Nolan trust and our amazing National Health Service, I am still here today. High Five indeed!
On that affirmative note I am off to cook myself supper! Hope all is good for everyone, everywhere. Not happy times around the globe I know. Lets hope peace prevails. Will be drawing this blog to a close in the next couple of months. I hit two years since my transplant on December 11th - so probably a good time to wrap up and say goodbye. Until then, love, high fives etc etc
back soon, tch x
ps. LVG still got to make a miracle at Old Trafford.
pps. photos of my beach-side retreat
beach combing
Rye Nature Reserve
the beach
rye harbour
Oh my lord - its two months since I posted an update! I know there are still people out there who read this - so my usual apologies, once again, for the long silence. But pretty much, no news is good news. Bloods are all behaving themselves, and sitting happily bang-in-the-middle of normal. Except for my platelets which have been dropping over the last few months. No-one knows quite why. Unfortunately, I do have a virus shunting round my blood system at the moment. Its called Epstien Barr virus - linked to chicken pox and all related poxie-type things. Its not so hot for bone marrow transplant patients though, as it can kick off nasty stuff. However I have no symptoms of anything, which is a good sign. The hospital are doing are regular two weekly blood tests to monitor the virus levels. Hopefully my baby immune system (well, teenage I guess by now) will sort it out. But its taking its time! Maybe the drop in platelets is linked to the EB virus... I am also struggling with very painful bones. Me and early mornings aren't the best of friends! Have recently had tests and X-rays done for arthritis - so waiting to see if these produce any evidence. However, despite these hic-cups things are on the up. My immunisation programme has started. I even had a flu jab last week. Overall, I have much more energy, though probably will never recover to my pre-transplant level of zoomablity. Still easy-as-pie to get exhausted and then I have to shut down for a couple of days and recharge.
I have had a couple of late summer visits to the caravan. The brilliant and beautiful Indian summer has been a good excuse to get down there for some long weekends. Some great dusk walks along the shoreline. Watching the sky as it moves through the gears of sunset: to the west where it glows hot and loud, fire red and orange. To the east where it is brushed with hushed colours. Goose grey, pistachio green and pale blue. Out on the nature reserve there is a 360 degree view of this sunset. It is stunning. And the nights are deeply dark. The millions of stars which are so crisp and clear, really do shine like diamonds in the sky. My caravan was a good move!
Two really great pieces of news: One is I have started my animation course. This is very exciting. First exercise was to cut out and make an articulated puppet. This was then filmed. I had an aardvark (of sorts) doing somersaults! Its a 30 week course, designed to teach a selection of animation techniques. I hope at some point to combine this with my printmaking. Anyway, I am a student again, one day a week (and flop-out-flat when I get home after an intense 10 hour day) and really enjoying myself. The second even-better-news is that I have managed to secure a new studio back in Havelock Walk. For those of you who know me, you will know that this is a major step forward, on all sorts of levels. I am thrilled that I have another studio space back in the street. This means I can start work again. This means too that my life is starting to feel like mine again. I am functioning without the constant support of hospital. Though I will never completely rid the medical ties that bind me. But hey, small price to pay for my life back and pretty much in once piece. Thanks to the amazing advances in modern medicine, the dedicated work of the Antony Nolan trust and our amazing National Health Service, I am still here today. High Five indeed!
On that affirmative note I am off to cook myself supper! Hope all is good for everyone, everywhere. Not happy times around the globe I know. Lets hope peace prevails. Will be drawing this blog to a close in the next couple of months. I hit two years since my transplant on December 11th - so probably a good time to wrap up and say goodbye. Until then, love, high fives etc etc
back soon, tch x
ps. LVG still got to make a miracle at Old Trafford.
pps. photos of my beach-side retreat
Tuesday 19 August 2014
POST HOLIDAYS
Ciao Tutti,
Fresh back from a week in St Ives. It was brilliant. Sunshine and wild green surf. I swam, walked everyday, ate like a horse. Stepped in (and quickly out of) endless art galleries bulging with a selection of pretty dire work (St Ives has been done to death). Visited Barbara Hepworths' garden, The Tate, Bernard Leach pottery. Had cream tea in a beach cafe (delicious). Fish and chips and a bottle of white wine on the harbour front. Amanda sang sea shanties. Watched surfers ride and wrestle with waves. Saw a seal - no basking sharks unfortunately. Spied the super-moon as it rose over Hayle Beach (not as big as expected). Took an open-top bus ride to Sennon Cove and then walked across the cliffs to Lands End. On cue (i.e. just as I arrived), the rains swept in from the west - obliterating the Lands End light-house. But as quickly as they arrived, they blew away again. That was good - as I had the return journey to do. Was lovely to spend time with dear old friends and catch up with lost ones. We all laughed a lot. My bed and breakfast was a hit. If anyone reading this visits St Ives, stay at Coast B&B. You won't be disappointed. Say I sent you!
The break was over too quickly (extended my stay by 3 days) and now back home tending my garden, which despite hot red dahlias still blooming and some late geraniums, is looking tired and rather bedraggled. A bit of cutting and clipping required and general preparation as we head into autumn. Cant believe we are already at the back end of summer.
The caravan down at Rye Harbour is fantastic. Have already stayed a few nights there - though as I write this, the excitement of it has been a bit gazzumped by my holiday out west! However, it is going to be such a great space to disappear to, recharge batteries and get a good dose of sea air. I hope that it will kick start some creative ideas. Perhaps I will get a dog too... Aiming to go back again next week. Stuff to do to make it feel like home.
This is a short blog update - I got to get myself to the gym now. Bloods dropping a bit, so I have to go back next week for more tests. Fingers crossed.
Love to everyone round this tiny globe. Italy, (ciao Graziella), Hong Kong, Australia, USA, Ireland, UK et al. Hope summer / winter has been a good one for you all. Thanks for emails, texts and comments still coming in; it is always great to hear from you - even anonymous messages from school days! I am amazed at old friends who have got in touch with me through this blog and total strangers too. The wonders of technology. Greetings to you all.
Back soon. tch xx
PS: some holiday photos...
Fresh back from a week in St Ives. It was brilliant. Sunshine and wild green surf. I swam, walked everyday, ate like a horse. Stepped in (and quickly out of) endless art galleries bulging with a selection of pretty dire work (St Ives has been done to death). Visited Barbara Hepworths' garden, The Tate, Bernard Leach pottery. Had cream tea in a beach cafe (delicious). Fish and chips and a bottle of white wine on the harbour front. Amanda sang sea shanties. Watched surfers ride and wrestle with waves. Saw a seal - no basking sharks unfortunately. Spied the super-moon as it rose over Hayle Beach (not as big as expected). Took an open-top bus ride to Sennon Cove and then walked across the cliffs to Lands End. On cue (i.e. just as I arrived), the rains swept in from the west - obliterating the Lands End light-house. But as quickly as they arrived, they blew away again. That was good - as I had the return journey to do. Was lovely to spend time with dear old friends and catch up with lost ones. We all laughed a lot. My bed and breakfast was a hit. If anyone reading this visits St Ives, stay at Coast B&B. You won't be disappointed. Say I sent you!
The break was over too quickly (extended my stay by 3 days) and now back home tending my garden, which despite hot red dahlias still blooming and some late geraniums, is looking tired and rather bedraggled. A bit of cutting and clipping required and general preparation as we head into autumn. Cant believe we are already at the back end of summer.
The caravan down at Rye Harbour is fantastic. Have already stayed a few nights there - though as I write this, the excitement of it has been a bit gazzumped by my holiday out west! However, it is going to be such a great space to disappear to, recharge batteries and get a good dose of sea air. I hope that it will kick start some creative ideas. Perhaps I will get a dog too... Aiming to go back again next week. Stuff to do to make it feel like home.
This is a short blog update - I got to get myself to the gym now. Bloods dropping a bit, so I have to go back next week for more tests. Fingers crossed.
Love to everyone round this tiny globe. Italy, (ciao Graziella), Hong Kong, Australia, USA, Ireland, UK et al. Hope summer / winter has been a good one for you all. Thanks for emails, texts and comments still coming in; it is always great to hear from you - even anonymous messages from school days! I am amazed at old friends who have got in touch with me through this blog and total strangers too. The wonders of technology. Greetings to you all.
Back soon. tch xx
PS: some holiday photos...
 |
| ST IVES |
 |
| SURFERS ON PORTHMEOR BEACH |
 |
| POST SWIM! |
 |
| ST IVES WILD LIFE |
 |
| SURFING SUNDOWN |
 |
| SEA SHANTY EVENING |
 |
| LANDS END LIGHTHOUSE |
Thursday 17 July 2014
TIME FLIES
Ciao Tutti!
oh dear - have received several emails over the last couple of days saying "No Blog! Whats up?" Yikes, its been almost seven weeks since I sat and bashed away at this keyboard. My apologies as usual. The days have just spun away - and I have been spinning with them.
First off, I am very pleased to write, no news is good news! My bloods are all stable and sitting in the normal zone. I am finally off those ghastly steroids. Face back to normal. Shakes gone. Phwee! I am also off the immunosuppressents, which means that I am "sailing solo" and so far so good. My new immune system hasn't turned on me (i.e. no GVHD). I am now only taking 5 pills a day - that is an easy swallow! Pill taking used to take me about 10 minutes - now I can throw them all back in one. Yes! My HOP visits are down to every five weeks, so my connection to the hospital is a lot less. However, weirdly it was quite a psychological struggle to wean myself off those clinic visits. Being frequently monitored was a real support. Now the spaces in-between visits are a lot longer, which gives the brain (mine in particular) time to fret and worry and wonder "whats going on inside?". There are still days when I have to talk to myself firmly and move on from the terror (I guess there will always be days like this from now on) - but my life is starting to take on a new healthier shape and rhythm. It feels like I am emerging from some terrible-tunnel-of-tangle. Each week my confidence grows and I am starting to really feel like my old self again. Oh, welcome home!
My tiny garden has been a joy this summer. An extravagance of colour and heady smells (honey suckle now replacing jasmine) bees, butterflies and two mice! The Battle of Snail is ongoing, but I am winning - although they did an amazing demolition of some dahlias the other night. The handsome ginger-ale tom cat that did nasty things to the Robins in the spring, has taken to visiting me daily. Being a bit of a sucker for a cat, I have sort of forgiven him. But I am aware his friendliness belies his true motives, which, I am sure are mouse one and two...
I drove down to Rye the other weekend to see my old friends Fred and Audrey. First long trip in the car - so it was a bit of a test for me. The next day I was completely whacked out - my battery life is still very short - it took me two days to recover. Forever my head will think I can do more than I physically can. It is very frustrating and a constant reminder of "things past". I am still having to learn how to pace myself so I can do normal things without collapsing in a heap. I am still going to the gym, though only twice a week now. On Monday I had a solid gristle-looking lump removed from my leg which required 7 stitches (frankenstien stitches at that) and strict instructions from the Doctor not to go near the gym for a week... Lump has been sent off for testing, but I am sure there is nothing sinister to it. However, given my history of strange lumps (which is how they discovered the leukaemia in the first place) - they are always cautious. Best to be, I guess.
In August I am off to St Ives for a few days. Seven hour train journey. Clackatie-clak; I love that sound. Will cross over the Dawlish line that the sea swallowed up in the February storms. Meeting Amanda down there and staying in a B&B run by an old friend who I originally met on a beach in Bali almost 30 years ago. Really looking forward to the break. Cornish sea air, cornish light, and no doubt, cornish cream.
My last bit of news is that I have just bought myself a static caravan down on Rye Harbour. Finally, I have my own place by the sea - for those of you that know me well, this is a dream I have nurtured for a good number of years. It is sited on a small caravan park, next to the River Rother and boundaries with the Rye Nature Reserve. A 15 minute walk through the reserve brings you onto a wide sweeping empty beach, with Camber Sands to the left and Hastings along the coast to the right. I am hoping this will be the start of something good - creatively at least. I will update on caravan and sea and big skies on my next blog. I am still waiting for the key...
It is a hot summer in London. Blue and lovely. Waiting for some rocking thunderstorms though. I hope wherever you all are summer is just as good. Hope too that everyone is healthy and happy and you are enjoying everything you are doing. Thanks for all your messages / emails etc. I am still amazed that this blog is still read. I will try and update a bit earlier next time (ha ha!). Love around the globe - north south east and west - a special hallo to my australian cousins who had lunch with me last week, but should be back in Sydney now - the turkish delight, fresh from Istanbul, was delicious!
Back soon, tch xxx
ps. World Cup: England's lions didn't even manage a snarl. So much for rumble in the jungle! Watched almost every match and was thoroughly footballed out by the time of the final last weekend. Guess the best team won. Though I was gunning for Columbia.
oh dear - have received several emails over the last couple of days saying "No Blog! Whats up?" Yikes, its been almost seven weeks since I sat and bashed away at this keyboard. My apologies as usual. The days have just spun away - and I have been spinning with them.
First off, I am very pleased to write, no news is good news! My bloods are all stable and sitting in the normal zone. I am finally off those ghastly steroids. Face back to normal. Shakes gone. Phwee! I am also off the immunosuppressents, which means that I am "sailing solo" and so far so good. My new immune system hasn't turned on me (i.e. no GVHD). I am now only taking 5 pills a day - that is an easy swallow! Pill taking used to take me about 10 minutes - now I can throw them all back in one. Yes! My HOP visits are down to every five weeks, so my connection to the hospital is a lot less. However, weirdly it was quite a psychological struggle to wean myself off those clinic visits. Being frequently monitored was a real support. Now the spaces in-between visits are a lot longer, which gives the brain (mine in particular) time to fret and worry and wonder "whats going on inside?". There are still days when I have to talk to myself firmly and move on from the terror (I guess there will always be days like this from now on) - but my life is starting to take on a new healthier shape and rhythm. It feels like I am emerging from some terrible-tunnel-of-tangle. Each week my confidence grows and I am starting to really feel like my old self again. Oh, welcome home!
My tiny garden has been a joy this summer. An extravagance of colour and heady smells (honey suckle now replacing jasmine) bees, butterflies and two mice! The Battle of Snail is ongoing, but I am winning - although they did an amazing demolition of some dahlias the other night. The handsome ginger-ale tom cat that did nasty things to the Robins in the spring, has taken to visiting me daily. Being a bit of a sucker for a cat, I have sort of forgiven him. But I am aware his friendliness belies his true motives, which, I am sure are mouse one and two...
I drove down to Rye the other weekend to see my old friends Fred and Audrey. First long trip in the car - so it was a bit of a test for me. The next day I was completely whacked out - my battery life is still very short - it took me two days to recover. Forever my head will think I can do more than I physically can. It is very frustrating and a constant reminder of "things past". I am still having to learn how to pace myself so I can do normal things without collapsing in a heap. I am still going to the gym, though only twice a week now. On Monday I had a solid gristle-looking lump removed from my leg which required 7 stitches (frankenstien stitches at that) and strict instructions from the Doctor not to go near the gym for a week... Lump has been sent off for testing, but I am sure there is nothing sinister to it. However, given my history of strange lumps (which is how they discovered the leukaemia in the first place) - they are always cautious. Best to be, I guess.
In August I am off to St Ives for a few days. Seven hour train journey. Clackatie-clak; I love that sound. Will cross over the Dawlish line that the sea swallowed up in the February storms. Meeting Amanda down there and staying in a B&B run by an old friend who I originally met on a beach in Bali almost 30 years ago. Really looking forward to the break. Cornish sea air, cornish light, and no doubt, cornish cream.
My last bit of news is that I have just bought myself a static caravan down on Rye Harbour. Finally, I have my own place by the sea - for those of you that know me well, this is a dream I have nurtured for a good number of years. It is sited on a small caravan park, next to the River Rother and boundaries with the Rye Nature Reserve. A 15 minute walk through the reserve brings you onto a wide sweeping empty beach, with Camber Sands to the left and Hastings along the coast to the right. I am hoping this will be the start of something good - creatively at least. I will update on caravan and sea and big skies on my next blog. I am still waiting for the key...
It is a hot summer in London. Blue and lovely. Waiting for some rocking thunderstorms though. I hope wherever you all are summer is just as good. Hope too that everyone is healthy and happy and you are enjoying everything you are doing. Thanks for all your messages / emails etc. I am still amazed that this blog is still read. I will try and update a bit earlier next time (ha ha!). Love around the globe - north south east and west - a special hallo to my australian cousins who had lunch with me last week, but should be back in Sydney now - the turkish delight, fresh from Istanbul, was delicious!
Back soon, tch xxx
ps. World Cup: England's lions didn't even manage a snarl. So much for rumble in the jungle! Watched almost every match and was thoroughly footballed out by the time of the final last weekend. Guess the best team won. Though I was gunning for Columbia.
Saturday 24 May 2014
SUNSHINE AFTER THE RAIN
Ciao Tutti,
Cant believe its over a month since I last posted on here. My memory is a bit shot these days and I am sitting here wracking my brains trying to remember whats been going on...Good news is that my last visit to HOP Clinic in the beginning to May saw my BEST EVER blood results. Everything sitting comfortably in the mid range of normal. What joy to be normal! I was so thrilled I could have kissed my consultant. I bounced out of Kings and sang all the way home in the car, with the roof wide open. I put a lot of this down to my new exercise regime at the gym. Its really helped control my fatigue levels and given me more energy, made me more steady, helped me to sleep better and best of all I am starting to shake off all those hot cross buns and other goodies that I was eating too often. Trouble is I am too self-competitive. I initially started doing 20 minutes gentle work out - then it went up to half an hour and started to include push-me-pull-you weight things. Each day a little more, upping resistance levels on the cross trainer and bicycle and pushing heavier weights (don't be fooled, 18kgms max for me!) Suddenly I was doing an hours workout. I was dead chuffed with myself. But my bones-all-over started to scream 'enough'! My knee kicked up a big fuss. I found myself hobbling down the hill to the gym. All of me ached. So I stopped for 5 days. Have now resumed a less strenuous half hour. Clearly I still think I can do more than I actually can. Recovery is a damn slow process. But I'm getting there. Oh, and steroids down to 1mg. Almost finished!
Cut all my chemo curls off a few weeks ago. I don't really like short hair, but it was psychology an important step. Looking in the mirror was a daily reminder of the whole transplant process. Now they have all gone, whats left is mine! A bit circa 1983 (wish I felt circa 1983 too) but it will grow. Much darker than before. That is a result of chemo/radiotherapy. Enough of hair.
My garden is full on colour at the moment. Everything coming up roses (literally). I go out everyday with a mug of coffee and chatter away to lavender, jasmine, allium, poppy, clematis, potentilla et al (my neighbours are used to my eccentric ways). May has been a really good month for sunshine and rain and everything is blooming. Unfortunately so too are snails and slugs. They are a never-ending battle. All plants have had a regular diet of Miracle Grow this spring which has really helped with prolific flowering (perhaps its helped the slugs too - they are enormous). I open the garden doors and get a heady whiff of jasmine in the morning. Heaven. On gardening theme, went to Chelsea Flower Show yesterday with Lulu and Julian. First time ever. Bit disappointed - thought it would inspire me with ideas. Sadly not. Unable to walk though 'show gardens' - you have to stand behind a rope and stare along with heaps of others jostling with cameras and mobile phones... much better on the TV. The place was also heaving with a jumble of stalls selling really terrible garden sculptures (I mean, just appalling): giant sandstone horses, life-size wire elephants, huge pottery lions (it was a jungle fest), towering glass alliums, twee little owls and robins and pots and planters - the list is endless. Bought a new slinky green covered garden hose (no kinks, it promises!) but decided against a packet of crisps for £1.90. The large marquee had some stunning flowers - but I was knackered but the time we got in there. Iris, banks of sweet peas, roses, and some fantastic vegetable displays. Despite failure to inspire, was glad I went. Flat out exhausted by the time I got home - slept solidly for 9 hours. First time I have done that in 18 months!
I have started a print course over in Blackheath. One day a week, just to get me back into the groove of work and printmaking. Thats another big step forward. Also underlines how much I miss my studio. Am on the lookout for a new space, but nothing appearing. I know I will have to set up a mini-workshop in my garage. I tried to do some work on the kitchen table the other day. Nightmare. Ink everywhere. Rollers and frying pans don't really mix.
Another first this month was a train and tube journey (have not travelled on public transport since July 2012!). Amazing how something so simple one just 'did' without thinking about it, now becomes a hurdle to leap, a cross to tick off (can you do such a thing?) a goal achieved. It was exhausting, but manageable. The Chilterns looked beautiful under blue skies and big Mr. Whippy clouds. Next on my list is a two hour drive down to Rye. I hope by next post that will be another tick to cross off.
Some of you have been asking about Luigi. I know I have not written about him for an age. Which is sad. I have not seen him since October - and miss him big time (but have got my independence back!) We are in regular, almost daily contact by phone. He has had a mountain of work problems. Moved from Venice to Milan. Looking for a new gallery. Been ill. Been ill some more. I am keeping my fingers crossed that he will be over during the summer. Its almost two years ago that I went out to meet him in Venice, just before my treatment started. I wouldn't mind to be on a vaporetta right now, splashing over the Guidecca canal, off to have lunch with my dear friends Paolo and Marina on their roof top terrace... One day.
Va bene. Hope everyone is good. As usual, thanks for all your supportive messages. There was open studios at Havelock Walk last weekend. I met a number of people whom I had no idea have been following this blog regularly. So to you all, a big hallo and thanks for your continuing interest and support on this road to recovery. I am really touched. And to other unknowns around the globe, thank you too for taking the time to read. Australian cousins - see you soon! Donegal, Wales, America, Italy, Singapore, HK, SA, UK - high fives and warm summer lovin' to you all. Back soon. tch x (oh, and World Cup just round the corner - whoopee!)
photos of garden and hair cut...
Cant believe its over a month since I last posted on here. My memory is a bit shot these days and I am sitting here wracking my brains trying to remember whats been going on...Good news is that my last visit to HOP Clinic in the beginning to May saw my BEST EVER blood results. Everything sitting comfortably in the mid range of normal. What joy to be normal! I was so thrilled I could have kissed my consultant. I bounced out of Kings and sang all the way home in the car, with the roof wide open. I put a lot of this down to my new exercise regime at the gym. Its really helped control my fatigue levels and given me more energy, made me more steady, helped me to sleep better and best of all I am starting to shake off all those hot cross buns and other goodies that I was eating too often. Trouble is I am too self-competitive. I initially started doing 20 minutes gentle work out - then it went up to half an hour and started to include push-me-pull-you weight things. Each day a little more, upping resistance levels on the cross trainer and bicycle and pushing heavier weights (don't be fooled, 18kgms max for me!) Suddenly I was doing an hours workout. I was dead chuffed with myself. But my bones-all-over started to scream 'enough'! My knee kicked up a big fuss. I found myself hobbling down the hill to the gym. All of me ached. So I stopped for 5 days. Have now resumed a less strenuous half hour. Clearly I still think I can do more than I actually can. Recovery is a damn slow process. But I'm getting there. Oh, and steroids down to 1mg. Almost finished!
Cut all my chemo curls off a few weeks ago. I don't really like short hair, but it was psychology an important step. Looking in the mirror was a daily reminder of the whole transplant process. Now they have all gone, whats left is mine! A bit circa 1983 (wish I felt circa 1983 too) but it will grow. Much darker than before. That is a result of chemo/radiotherapy. Enough of hair.
My garden is full on colour at the moment. Everything coming up roses (literally). I go out everyday with a mug of coffee and chatter away to lavender, jasmine, allium, poppy, clematis, potentilla et al (my neighbours are used to my eccentric ways). May has been a really good month for sunshine and rain and everything is blooming. Unfortunately so too are snails and slugs. They are a never-ending battle. All plants have had a regular diet of Miracle Grow this spring which has really helped with prolific flowering (perhaps its helped the slugs too - they are enormous). I open the garden doors and get a heady whiff of jasmine in the morning. Heaven. On gardening theme, went to Chelsea Flower Show yesterday with Lulu and Julian. First time ever. Bit disappointed - thought it would inspire me with ideas. Sadly not. Unable to walk though 'show gardens' - you have to stand behind a rope and stare along with heaps of others jostling with cameras and mobile phones... much better on the TV. The place was also heaving with a jumble of stalls selling really terrible garden sculptures (I mean, just appalling): giant sandstone horses, life-size wire elephants, huge pottery lions (it was a jungle fest), towering glass alliums, twee little owls and robins and pots and planters - the list is endless. Bought a new slinky green covered garden hose (no kinks, it promises!) but decided against a packet of crisps for £1.90. The large marquee had some stunning flowers - but I was knackered but the time we got in there. Iris, banks of sweet peas, roses, and some fantastic vegetable displays. Despite failure to inspire, was glad I went. Flat out exhausted by the time I got home - slept solidly for 9 hours. First time I have done that in 18 months!
I have started a print course over in Blackheath. One day a week, just to get me back into the groove of work and printmaking. Thats another big step forward. Also underlines how much I miss my studio. Am on the lookout for a new space, but nothing appearing. I know I will have to set up a mini-workshop in my garage. I tried to do some work on the kitchen table the other day. Nightmare. Ink everywhere. Rollers and frying pans don't really mix.
Another first this month was a train and tube journey (have not travelled on public transport since July 2012!). Amazing how something so simple one just 'did' without thinking about it, now becomes a hurdle to leap, a cross to tick off (can you do such a thing?) a goal achieved. It was exhausting, but manageable. The Chilterns looked beautiful under blue skies and big Mr. Whippy clouds. Next on my list is a two hour drive down to Rye. I hope by next post that will be another tick to cross off.
Some of you have been asking about Luigi. I know I have not written about him for an age. Which is sad. I have not seen him since October - and miss him big time (but have got my independence back!) We are in regular, almost daily contact by phone. He has had a mountain of work problems. Moved from Venice to Milan. Looking for a new gallery. Been ill. Been ill some more. I am keeping my fingers crossed that he will be over during the summer. Its almost two years ago that I went out to meet him in Venice, just before my treatment started. I wouldn't mind to be on a vaporetta right now, splashing over the Guidecca canal, off to have lunch with my dear friends Paolo and Marina on their roof top terrace... One day.
Va bene. Hope everyone is good. As usual, thanks for all your supportive messages. There was open studios at Havelock Walk last weekend. I met a number of people whom I had no idea have been following this blog regularly. So to you all, a big hallo and thanks for your continuing interest and support on this road to recovery. I am really touched. And to other unknowns around the globe, thank you too for taking the time to read. Australian cousins - see you soon! Donegal, Wales, America, Italy, Singapore, HK, SA, UK - high fives and warm summer lovin' to you all. Back soon. tch x (oh, and World Cup just round the corner - whoopee!)
photos of garden and hair cut...
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| Grassmount garden |
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| garden detail |
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| lilly |
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| rose |
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| cistus |
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| gerbera (on the way out) |
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| before |
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| after |
Saturday 19 April 2014
EASTER 2014
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Ciao Tutti
Quick-flick easter blog to say Happy Easter round the globe. Hope you all having a great time, wherever you are. Don't eat too much chocolate. Weather got cold again, so my easter "working in the garden" plan is currently put on hold. Instead central heating is on and I hope there will be a decent film or two on tv...
I have finally signed up to the local gym in Forest Hill. Need to build my stamina and muscle tone (plus need to loose some weight!). Nothing too strenuous to start with, twenty minutes on the cross trainer and bicycle-pedal-thingy. Brings on a small sweat. Will try for 25 minutes next week... I feel very out of place there, as it is heaving with young fit mostly males, rippling torsos and muscles. Lots of loud music and sweat. I wander in looking like an old bag lady (it seems) - and climb gingerly onto these huge machines (terrified of falling off the cross trainer) and start to slowly push push push with my hopelessly soft calf muscles. You have to dial in a "resistance factor". I notice the tight-t-shirted guy next to me is working with a resistance factor of 19. Mine is 4. Blimey, I have some work to do! There is a middle aged man on the running machine. He is really going for it. Thump thump thump - his feet hit the speeding running belt. He is boiled lobster colour - and soaking wet. I wonder if he will have a heart attack. My time is up, I swig some cold water, and walk out clutching my sainsburys shopping bag. Off to buy coffee. And then home for a hot-cross bun in the garden. Possibly defeats the object. But hey - at least I am going to the gym!
All good blood wise. I am now going monthly to the HOP (!) which is a big step forward. Next visit in the beginning of May. They gave me some blood pressure tablets which have made my head itch to distraction. So stopped taking them yesterday. Tired of endless medications and rotten side effects. Steroids down to 2mg, so face almost back to normal! Now I am being weaned off my immuno suppressants too. Once I am finished with all those, I will then be revaccinated with all my childhood vaccinations, which is quite a bizarre thought.
Sad news to report is that my resident robins where the victims of a cat attack. One morning the garden was full of mad tweeting. First the robins, then the tits joined in and finally a magpie too. A cacophony of bird chatter. It was clear something was amiss and I went out and banged the fence and made lots of shooing noises. Then I saw him, a handsome ginger-ale-tom stalk boldly out of my next door neighbours garden. He glared at me and then wandered off nonchalantly into the spring sunshine. Meantime Robins were in a terribly twittering state. They had lost their nest (not sure if it had eggs or chicks inside). They flew away that day. I haven't seen them since. They have been hanging round the garden for years. I hope they return. I miss my garden companions.
Ok. Short and sweet this entry. Hope everyone good, healthy and happy. Thanks for all messages from everywhere. Love to everyone, family, friends and unknown blog readers - and for no reason at all, other than I have just thought of it, a special hallo to all the Somerset posse. I hope later this year to take a trip down the A303. Lots of you to visit... BUON PASQUA TUTTI! Back soon tch xx
ps London spring is fantastic. Clean-green trees against blue-blue sky. Everything bursting into colour. What a buzz. Brilliant and beautiful.
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