BELT AND BRACES

I thought things where challenging enough! A broken back in the mix adds another level of nightmare to everything. I had to lay completely flat for two days (being spoon fed), while damage was assessed: compressed fracture of lumbar one. Finally the neurological surgeons gave the all clear that the fracture was 'stable' which allows me to wear a brace and start to slowly move round. I have spent the last week learning to put brace on and off - a huge contraption that velcrows round my waist, has a supportive spinal back and two large metal circles that support my chest. Imagine a Star Wars outfit ( Darth Vadar's soldiers)  - something akin to that. It's heavy and cumbersome, but I can walk with it on and have also managed to get up and down stairs. It will be very challenging getting in and out of taxi for my frequent visits to the HOP Clinic... They reckon I will have to wear it for three to four months...

It impacts on everything: going to the loo, getting dressed, bathing - no bath for as long as I have to wear it...loosing mobility is the worse thing, unable to reach for stuff, everything taking ages to do. In hospital I am in bed a lot of the time, but need to keep as active as possible to insure my muscles keep working - and they were already weak, so now doubly difficult! Oh what a mess! My wrist is a compressed fracture which will take about six weeks to heal. They have cast is in some green fiberglass material that looks like something you would get in a garden centre....of course, having very little use of left wrist makes things twice as hard, especially getting the brace on and off.

Blood wise, things look like they might be starting to improve, as haemoglobin is holding and I haven't needed a transfusion for two weeks, which is a great relief. However, don't want to count my chickens just yet, it is so easy for everything to turn in the blink of an eye. If I hadn't stood on the sofa to water a plant, I would be home enjoying sunshine, garden and Luigi...instead I am on RD Lawrence ward, a ground floor outpost of the haematological wards, sharing a room with an old Nigerian lady. She has a large extended family who visit daily. There is no tv, and only an intermittent radio and internet signal...more brick walls to look at, but also a spiral aluminum staircase outside of my window. I imagine it full of pots of red geraniums. Also the windows open a tad soI can hear planes flying overhead, unknown voices, road drills, kitchen clatter and at night I get a coolish breeze. God it has been so hot.

That's enough for now, I am tired. Just had my blood results and my neutrophils have dropped almost to the point of being neutropenic. Just what I need, they have been so good recently...enough enough. I want o bury my head in the sand, but have to keep looking straight ahead. Forwards on this long and winding road..

Ciao to everyone, thanks for messages, lovely to hear from you all and so much needed right now. Back soon. tch xx